Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize