So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
