He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
