if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
