google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
