we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
