How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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