I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
