I feel like I'm in dance class right now
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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