Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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