Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize