Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Randomize
