No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
