Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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