Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
