I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
