i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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