is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I want to have your abortion
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
