Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize