why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Come on in and take your pants off
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