Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize