She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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