I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
