Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Randomize
