i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Randomize
