Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
