I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
send nudes
from the living room?
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize