I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
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