good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
