I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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