Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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