trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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