sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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