the new term for farting is butt boxing.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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