Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
