For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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