is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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