Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
