I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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