normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
please come you make the beer taste better
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
