are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Randomize
