is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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