the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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