she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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