My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
She's not a foreskin expert like you
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Randomize
