I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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