I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Randomize
