what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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