I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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