but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize