Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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