Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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